My thoughts ahead of Fashion Month…

Everyone in fashion lives and breathes for Fashion Month.

For me, the thought of the bi-annual (more even if you count couture and men’s) spectacle could just as well be skipped, and we could go straight to working directly with designers on their new collections, pre-orders and pre-planning wardrobes ahead of Season. What makes my stomach turn and I wish we could skip are the parties, events and shows.

I remember my first ever London Fashion Week. I was working for a tiny boutique in Chelsea, and the eccentric owner passed on her invitation to a handful of runway shows to me. It was 2011, I had just moved to London from Munich a year prior, had since gone through a break-up and a complete career-path change away from music, and I had never felt cooler, more seen or more special. I wore a brown cocktail dress and Prada heels.

Since then attending fashion shows became more and more tiresome as I was asked to take content for businesses, in charge of capturing the vibe and good enough photographs for global clients to then purchase the looks shown moments prior, right off the runway - all from total nosebleed seats all the way in a back corner. Sweating, and running from show to show across town (no money for taxis).

I don’t want to sound ungrateful, I’ve had some absolutely amazing experiences that will stay with me forever- especially during couture weeks over the years, I’ve seen stunning collections, experienced fantastic front row seats and after show parties. (Where I hand one drink and then felt like passing out and watching Netflix in bed.)

The actuality is that I am not an influencer in the traditional sense- on Instagram or TikTok.

Yes, I influence my community and my clients, and sales and pre-orders I place with brands post fashion week are extensive, to the point where brands may send me gifts and invite me to private re-sees and send me virtual documents ahead of anyone else so I can secure the best pieces for my treasured client base, but I am not an Insta-girl, and so I am often (mostly) not invited to the runway show, the dinners or the parties. Basically the glamour and the stuff people go into fashion for.

And here is my dilemma; I don’t actually want to leave the comfort of my house, and am a true introvert at heart, but still feel a sense of worthlessness when a brand I have worked with for years and that considers me a VVIP client, does not invite me to their launch or dinner - instead (as I sit on my sofa in my pyjama) I see instagram filled with girls in fancy dresses ‘influencing’.

Is it me? My personality? My face? My wardrobe?

I feel that although my personal instagram is private and my business social accounts are mostly unused and just token, I should at least have the option to live the glamorous life that comes with the industry we are in.

And in turn my mind then wonders; if I start attending shows and dinners, will my social accounts magically blow up? Or does ultimately no one care whether I’m out or in?

Do I even have a right to feel that twinge in my stomach when I see a brand that I have just purchased an entire collection from, host a cocktail party and choose an influencer to market and attend with all of her friends? Do the brands and business even know that I would (sometimes) love to attend myself? That if given the chance I would host like no one has hosted before (perhaps?)

So as we move into yet another Fashion Month, do I stay away completely and ignore the extravaganza that each city designs, until the time comes to place pre-orders with brands directly, which is when I emerge from the ashes like a phoenix and use Vogue Runway and digital shots to pick and choose and pre-pay?

Or is this Season the time for me to come out of my shell?